poopflow:

*popular blog follows me* oh shit i better not fCUk *spaghetti spills out of my pockets* Shit shit what *throws computer after slipping in spaghetti* fUCK

sexyseventhgrader:

a headline I wasnt prepared to read

immortaltrash:

when you remember something embarrassing you did 6 years ago

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jasonttodd:

callmekitto:

crackiswhacksherlock:

moriarty:

jashuwa:

moriarty:

what do you mean not everyone has a toilet that washes and massages your butt

Wait there are toilets like that?

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what an incredible experience it must be

im mildly concerned about something labeled “turbo” going near my butt

notwifi:

when someone you don’t know tries to read you

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kia-kaha-winchesters:

just the girly things

  • forcing an earing through a closed piercing
  • taking off tight clothes and rubbing the indents they left on your skin 
  • human sacrifice
  • homemade face masks 

beholdmyrobes:

beholdmyrobes:

hello world i’m willingly awake before noon and trying to adjust to this strange new lifestyle

i just fucking poured orange juice into my coffee